The other night my neighbor who is in High School asked if Patrick and I would do an interview about our marriage. We laughed and said of course we would. She had 5 questions that she needed us to answer...on video at that.
The first question she asked was "What does commitment mean to you?" Patrick 's short quick answer caught me a little off guard. He said it means saying no. He explained that it means telling others no because your family is a priority. In every marriage there are times where no is said more often than yes and unfortunately we have had many years of saying no a lot. It got me thinking about the times we have had to say no since we got married. When Wyatt was born we declined offers so often...even before he was diagnosed because he was such an ornery baby. He cried for hours and hours and who wanted to have a screaming infant at their party. Then once Wyatt diagnosed the no's came more and more frequent. Because we so often we had to decline invitations the invites became less and less. I have said this many times before, but if you haven't heard, so many families lose friends because the no's are hard to deal with or understand why we have to say no. But we understand that the commitment to our family means more to us than saying yes to others.
When I answered, I agreed with Patrick, but I also said it means saying yes everyday. It's saying yes, I choose you Patrick everyday. I choose him to be my partner and my friend. I say yes to our family life and living a life that isn't for the weak. It is hard to commit when life throws so many heartaches but it is such a great feeling when you get through the tough times because you chose each other everyday. We say yes to be there in the good times and the bad and though sickness and in health.
Since November 6, 2004 those words have rung true. At a recent wedding I had tears when the bride and groom said their vows. You have to say yes to your relationship and choose to commit to one another each and everyday.
The questions continued about good times, faith, and our biggest struggle. We both agreed that as a family our biggest struggle is the obvious Duchenne. But with faith that all things will work out we have found the good things in life. These things are not the tangible ones...it's the time that we spend together as a family to enjoy everyday and commit to finding happiness and joy in the journey.
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